Installment #51

Back on Match I went; I mean, it only made sense since I had five months of my membership left. A week or two goes by and I find myself meeting up with “Match#2” for a drink (remember what I said in the last installment); this time I made it a point to not let that drink turn into an eight-hour outing. Match#2 had a good, steady job and owned his own house; all pluses on my checklist of non-negotiables. I didn’t find myself extremely physically attracted to him, he was bald, tall and very thin, but he was cute, sweet and thoughtful, and had a gentle nature. He had two kids, one was older and about to finish high school (I could deal with that), the second one was only three years old. This was a tough one for me and to add to that toughness, the mother of a three-year-old created a lot of baby-mama-drama… another red flag, if you will, and something I certainly did not want to become a full-time part of my life. However, I went forth with the relationship. In hindsight I should have walked away, but I guess there was a lesson there that I needed to learn. And honestly, that’s how I look at everything in life… there are no mistakes or regrets, everything is just an opportunity for growth. Match#2 was the lead singer and guitarist in a local band, this made for some different kind of fun throughout the summer months that we dated. I invited everyone I knew to come and watch the band play at different venues and locations, and I guess one good thing to come out of all this, for him, was a whole new fan base. My friends told their friends and I know that many of them continued to go out and hear the band play after my relationship with him ended. We dated for about three months, and then, one day out of the blue, he started acting strange. Lucky for me I have a keen sixth sense and I didn’t waste any time confronting him about his odd, distant behavior; I just came right out and asked if he didn’t want to see me anymore, and after the swallowing of a throat lump, he confirmed my suspicions. And that was that, I really wasn’t too upset about it, and it didn’t take too much time for me to realize and admit to myself that I was never truly engrossed in that relationship from day one, that I was just going through the motions and ignoring the fact that this particular “package bundle” wasn’t at all what I was truly searching for.

Lessons: It’s okay to go out with someone a few times to get to know them better, but if you’re still not feeling it you need to move on. Listen to your gut (obviously I didn’t fully learn this lesson from the previous “Match”). I’m not really a fan of guys with thin frames.



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