Installment #48

Growing Older

I wonder, do all at some point in their life think they will not age? Every day it seems that I wake up to more blurry vision; but I look into the mirror and I am glad my vision isn't 20/20 anymore, it helps to ease the nightmare of what is happening to my face, hair and body. Maybe this is why our eyesight starts to go as we grow old, to help us with this visual transition? In my fantasy world I get up every morning, eat a balanced breakfast, and work-out; I have smooth, porcelain-like skin and my body is toned and defined. That is my “fantasy” world! In real life I don’t eat until I’m starving, which is around 1-2pm and I define myself as a binge exerciser - I'll do it religiously for a good period of time, then drop it like a cold, dead fish. And my skin… Oh, if I could turn back the hands of time I would have never, ever laid out in the sun! I also would have worn sunscreen whenever I was going to be out in the sun. I would have sucked it up and went through life white as a ghost, and maybe - just maybe - I would still have beautiful porcelain-like skin, similar to the color and texture of the skin on my arse. These days I take precautions, but the damage is already done. The stupidity of using baby oil instead of sunscreen; the stupidity of laying out in the blistering heat for hours at a time; the stupidity of not taking precautions way back when… for this, I now pay the price. 52 years into my life and I have this unattractive, freckle-covered, brown-spot-coated, white-spot-dotted, uneven blotchy mess that looks 10 years older than it really is. I've got these tiny bumpy spots all over my chest, stomach and legs that my Doctor assures me is just "old age", and that they will only get worse… WoooooHoooo! Do they make a cream, rub, scrub, or paste that reverses, tightens, smooths, or lightens? NO, they do not and do not be fooled or sucked into any of the infomercials; I have tried them all and I am here to tell you they DO NOT perform the miracles they advertise. Plastic surgery is always an option, but I am not that desperate… yet. When I first heard the song “After the Storm” by Mumford and Sons, it made me think about my life, my body, and my mind. I dedicate that song to the vessel that carries my soul.

PSA – don’t forget your sunscreen!


circa approx. 1990


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