Installment #71

How to make the perfect snow angel!


  • First - find yourself with nothing to do on a dark, snowy Saturday night. Taking a walk at night in the snow is so peaceful and calming. You just can't help but think angelic thoughts.Second - find a spot that is untouched by humans or nature.....or snow plows! A flat space is best as you will not end up with tall blades of grass or weeds sticking up through your work of art in the end.

  • Take position, being very careful not to taint your workspace with footprints or other unnecessary marks in the snow. If you are good at levitation, this would be the best method of lowering yourself in to position. Once you are lying in the snow, legs straight and arms straight over head, make a motion with your arms and legs as if you are a string puppet - spreading your arms and legs as wide out as they will go and returning to the starting position. This may need to be done several times to make a good indentation in the snow, depending how deep the snow is.This entire process should make you laugh and bring back memories of childhood. Ahhh doesn't it feel good! Who says you can't make snow angels as an adult! If you find yourself not filled with laughter, reach around and pull that stick out of your ass.

  • Speaking of asses, do not attempt this in the nude - dangerous frostbite could occur!

  • Now comes the hard part, unless you ARE good at levitation. You must pull yourself up from your starting position as to NOT mess up the artwork. Having a friend to help you is the best way to avoid ruining your masterpiece. There will be a few footprints where you started, you can lightly brush over those with your hand if you like to smooth things out.

  • Voila! Stand back and admire the spiritual illusion before you.





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